Tuesday, October 24, 2023

Review: The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change by Stephen R. Covey
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

"September 19, 2019 – Started Reading
September 19, 2022 – Shelved
September 19, 2022 – Shelved as: chance-deserve
September 19, 2022 – page 62
16.67% "This books is well written"
June 13, 2023 – page 144
38.71%"

- At first it was a big deal for me because this was given to me as present from my sibling, but with time and discovering different type of courses.
Like Working on yourself, motivation and also going throw pick up communities and pick system. My opinion this is like a revision of what I have already learn you can synthesized it to 5 categories.

Independence
The first three habits aim at developing from dependence to independence (i.e., self-mastery):

Habit 1: "Be proactive"
Proactivity is about taking responsibility for one's reaction to one's own experiences, taking the initiative to respond positively and improve the situation. Covey postulates that "between stimulus and response lies your ability to choose" how to react, and that nothing can hurt a person without the person's consent. Covey discusses recognizing one's circle of influence and circle of concern. Covey discusses focusing one's responses and focusing on the center of one's influence.

Habit 2: "Begin with the end in mind"
Covey discusses envisioning what one wants in the future (a personal mission statement) so one can work and plan towards it, and understanding how people make important life decisions. To be effective one needs to act based on principles and constantly review one's mission statements, says Covey. He asks: Are you—right now—who you want to be? What do you have to say about yourself? How do you want to be remembered? If habit 1 advises changing one's life to act and be proactive, habit 2 advises that "you are the programmer". Grow and stay humble, Covey says.

Covey says that all things are created twice: Before one acts, one should act in one's mind first. Before creating something, measure twice. Do not just act; think first: Is this how I want it to go, and are these the correct consequences?

Habit 3: "Put first things first"
See also: Eisenhower matrix

Covey talks about what is important versus what is urgent. Priority should be given in the following order:

Quadrant I. Urgent and important (Do) – important deadlines and crises
Quadrant II. Not urgent but important (Plan) – long-term development
Quadrant III. Urgent but not important (Delegate) – distractions with deadlines
Quadrant IV. Not urgent and not important (Eliminate) – frivolous distractions
The order is important, says Covey: after completing items in quadrant I, people should spend the majority of their time on II, but many people spend too much time in III and IV. The calls to delegate and eliminate are reminders of their relative priority.

If habit 2 advises that "you are the programmer", habit 3 advises: "write the program, become a leader". Keep personal integrity by minimizing the difference between what you say versus what you do, says Covey.

Interdependence
The next three habits talk about interdependence (i.e., working with others):

Habit 4: "Think win–win"
Seek mutually beneficial win–win solutions or agreements in your relationships, says Covey. Valuing and respecting people by seeking a "win" for all is ultimately a better long-term resolution than if only one person in the situation had gotten their way. Thinking win–win isn't about being nice, nor is it a quick-fix technique; it is a character-based code for human interaction and collaboration, says Covey.

Habit 5: "Seek first to understand, then to be understood"
See also: Rogerian argument
Use empathetic listening to genuinely understand a person, which compels them to reciprocate the listening and take an open mind to be influenced. This creates an atmosphere of caring, and positive problem-solving.

Habit 5 is expressed in the ancient Greek philosophy of three modes of persuasion:

Ethos is one's personal credibility. It's the trust that one inspires, one's "emotional bank account".
Pathos is the empathetic side, the alignment with the emotional trust of another person's communication.
Logos is the logic, the reasoning part of the presentation.
The order of the concepts indicates their relative importance, says Covey.

Habit 6: "Synergize"
Combine the strengths of people through positive teamwork, so as to achieve goals that no one could have done alone, Covey exhorts.

Continual improvement
The final habit is that of continuous improvement in both the personal and interpersonal spheres of influence.

Habit 7: "Sharpen the saw"
See also: Kaizen
Covey says that one should balance and renew one's resources, energy, and health to create a sustainable, long-term, effective lifestyle. He primarily emphasizes exercise for physical renewal, good prayer, and good reading for mental renewal. He also mentions service to society for spiritual renewal.

Covey explains the "upward spiral" model. Through conscience, along with meaningful and consistent progress, an upward spiral will result in growth, change, and constant improvement. In essence, one is always attempting to integrate and master the principles outlined in The 7 Habits at progressively higher levels at each iteration. Subsequent development on any habit will render a different experience and one will learn the principles with a deeper understanding. The upward spiral model consists of three parts: learn, commit, do. According to Covey, one must be increasingly educating the conscience in order to grow and develop on the upward spiral. The idea of renewal by education will propel one along the path of personal freedom, security, wisdom, and power, says Covey.

(P.S.: Most of this concepts you can see them in pick up books
like

The Pickup Artist (By Mystery And Chris Odom), The Game (By Neil Strauss), Rules Of The Game (By Neil Strauss), The Dating Playbook For Men (By Andrew Ferebee), Jason Capital System (Works)
Models (By Mark Manson), Pick-Up Artists’ Secrets (By Pickup Artists Anonymous), The Diary Of A Pick Up Artist (By Adam Lyons), The Art Of Seduction (By Robert Greene), The Mystery Method (By Mystery And Chris Odom) and etc.
Still I am not proposing the concept "go exploit women". I am just saying get your cards right learn stuff about them don't keep lying to yourself and with time you have progress with women. The most important part is after blue pill go for the red pill.)

(Probably somewhere in the near future, I will post article on my thoughts about women so far you can also check out my books where I go over bunch of concepts.)

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